My showers are now taken after 8pm. This is after the baby is asleep. I am able to wash my hair, shave my legs. Lately, I have been taking baths. I light candles and listen to Sade. I was not one of the people who posted about the beauty of her concert. I was probably asleep.
Someone asked me why I haven’t been writing on my blog. It’s not that I don’t have time. I can squeeze in a half an hour if I let myself. It’s that I am no longer alone. My life is not just about me. I have a family with good moments and hard ones. I don’t know how to write about what is going on when I am not the only one involved.
Right now I will stick to light things like, my son has the cutest spaces between his teeth. So, does his father. I remember wanting to stick my tongue between the gaps of his teeth when I first met him. But I am Muslim and I do not do such things on first meetings.
My days are long and at the end of them I can not speak. If I do it is to say, I can’t talk right now. Every moment I want to complain I think to myself, I appreciate that I have a family I really hated being alone. I think, everything is temporary even feeling so tired. One day, maybe this weekend, I will take a long nap with my son cuddled in my arms and I will wake up all refreshed.